I am quite the old-school types. Of times when sparks flew as love-at-first-sight happened, when happiness was in small things, when say 'Hi!' to an unknown was so much easier. 

Even though I mentioned that happiness was in small things, I used to love the long form. Inland letters, postcards, hand-written letters posted by someone, to someone. And the pleasure of receiving it is unmatched. Completely pure! Its like each letter has been crafted with so much love and affection and every emotion is depicted so clearly and so beautifully on paper. It's like someone has left their heart open for you. To peek into it and weave memories together. 

But then things changed. Hand-written letters became passé, were then called snail mails and emails became the next big thing. I was quite okay with this change. I could still sense the affection in every written, or rather typed, word. I loved reading, writing and receiving long, enormously long emails. 

Today, I experience the downside of maturing. Long form has become shorter and short isn't so sweet anymore. The charm of the old is taken over by the snappiness of the new. And so much for adapting, I personally find it extremely exhausting to write long emails. Reading them can get taxing too. I hardly write anymore. 

Its like we are in a constant state of over-communication. The need and the urge to stay connected always, to share, to inform has defied the necessity to write that long letter to a loved one, to pour your heart out to someone, to say the unsaid. 

With the hope to bring myself back from the dead, to try and write to one loved one every once in a while, I hope this is a start, for the sake of myself, if not for anyone else, Adios!

Perfection!

So there are some people who have it all in their lives. Not in multiple lives. In just One Single LIFE.

A sexy figure, please remember that they never seem to be putting on weight. This is followed by great looks. They never have a bad hair day.

A fantastic career. Their career graph almost always seems to be skyrocketing.

Men from all the corners of the world falling head over heels for them.

All the money in the world. Harry Winston and Cartier are like custom-made for them. Their wishes are fulfilled even before they have completed their thought.

Long fancy vacations to take up regularly. Be it taking up a leisurely trip to the Cote d’Azur, or maybe get lost in Macedonia or live in fancy resorts in the Bahamas.

And they go and live abroad. Whenever they want and for as long as they want. Please understand this means that they have tones of cousins living in there and also possibly apartments in the city.

They get the perfect ring, the perfect wedding, the perfect holiday, the perfect paycheck. It is all so perfect that it’s intoxicating. But they love it. And people like me envy it. Totally do.

The point is, they have a perfect life. And they are annoyingly demanding for perfection in everything they want. But that I do too. But guess what, they get it.

And I keep living my dream for achievement. And all that jazz.

Please don’t judge me on this. It is just one of those days that is killing me. Making me feel like a loser in this whole wide world. Make me rant about the imperfection that my life is. That there is so much that I could do but was lazy enough to do any of it. That maybe I am not talented enough to do any of it. Will never be able to. But yeah, realistically, I haven’t done any of it. My to-do list keeps growing and very few get completed. I wonder how many will I take down my grave.

And even if you do judge. I couldn’t care less.

And whoever wants to tell me that this ain’t buying happiness for such people? Maybe you don’t know coz you don’t have it too! And you’d rather keep your opinions to yourself.

The Rom-Com Girl

So I’m just that. A simple silly girl. Quite the regular sorts, you know. The one, who grows up dreaming of her Prince Charming, cries like a fool while watching those romantic comedies and dreams of those insanely beautiful things happening to her. I cannot remember the number of times I would have seen SRK create the magic, fill my nerves with the sensation of love which oozes out of my eyes as I lay in bed, hoping for someone to say that perfect line to me. Yeah, that’s quite a confession on a public forum.

The internet is filled with articles which says how watching romantic comedies excessively can negatively affect your love life. Here’s one for your reference: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/scotland/edinburgh_and_east/7784366.stm

Well, maybe it does. But then again, would that stop me from watching Hitch endlessly and hear him say Never lie, steal, cheat or drink. But if you must lie, lie in the arms of the one you love. If you must steal, steal away from bad company. If you must cheat, cheat death. And if you must drink, drink in the moments that take your breath away.

But there is a twist in this tale. While I may have grown up dreaming of Mr Perfect, along the way, I realized with my friends that this Mr Perfect doesn’t really exist. Coz perfection somewhere is boring again. But this isn’t the right time to talk about that, about my commitment phobia. Maybe some other day.

Coming back to the discussion of the day, all those people who cringe on the idea of how could someone watch these romantic comedies endlessly, fail to understand the idea behind watching it. For me, it isn’t about watching those stories. I know how it would end: the cliché of boy-girl ending up together, heading for a life together. I want to learn about the journey. The way it began, how they meet, what’s their story and how they end up together. Finally. Coz, to me, it is the journey that matters, the magic that is created; the first times: the first bunch of flowers given, the first dinner, the first surprise, the first kiss. It might all seem corny, mushy and unlike something most men would like to do. But, to that simple, silly girl, it would mean the world. These are the moments that would weave memories for a lifetime. Isn’t life worth it then?

I know it is over-rated. That thing called love, romance, etc etc… I know it is a farce, a business strategy to boost sales of those gift shop chains and the moviemakers to have housefull shows and box office hits. But the fact that these movies are made, is witness to the idea that someone at least had the audacity to think of something so sensitive. And it worked. Coz when you feel it, you just do it. Don’t you? It is like the opening scene of Love Actually at Heathrow Airport when the voiceover says… If you see closely, love is, in fact, all around.

Would I want to have that adrenaline rush, that smile that never stops, makes my jaws ache terribly? You bet, I would!

PS. So what did the Princess do after she was rescued by the Prince?

Strange Meeting

Well, the title of the blog may be borrowed from one of war poet Wilfred Owen's celebrated works, but I assure you it is nowhere similar to the plot. In fact, this story isn't about war. It is about love. That knows no barriers. Of countries or language. (And this ISN'T inspired from the recent film Kites)

*incidence of a real life*

I met him on my first trip abroad.
I was really excited about the trip in the first place. It was to Star Cruises, on a three day cruise journeying Hong Kong- Sanya in China- Hoang Long bay in Vietnam. Having a cruise journey was exciting in the first place and then being able to have a glimpse of the three destinations, I was super excited and particularly about visiting Vietnam. And it happened there.

We had to take a ferry ride from our ship to reach the shore of Vietnam. He was in the same boat as me. I was casually having a good time with my group, we were singing, clicking pictures, having fun and he was with his folks there. The moment I saw him, we just kept looking at each other. At first, stealing glances and then we came close, interacted with each other. I then realised that we would never be able to speak with each other. He was from North Korea. Those mesmerising tiny eyes, that ruffled hair, the soft skin, he was dream-like. I instantly got attracted to him. We fooled around for some time, taking pictures, making faces at each other. I was so excited, it felt like I fell instantly in love with him.

But as we landed on the shore, he went ahead with his group n I with mine, exchanging just a smile with each other. I hoped against hope to see him again, meet him at the ship again. I saw him a few times after that, we smiled, fooled around for moments but it was too short a time that I could say we spent quality time with each other. That night as I went back in my cabin, I actually kept looking at his pics in my camera before I fell asleep. I was really attracted to him.

The next day was sad. very sad. It was the day of departure. And I was hoping to see him for a last time before we departed. I didn't know if we would ever meet again. I mentally decided I would take his contact details, take the first step when I meet him next. Waiting at the departure area, my eyes kept screening every boy to see if it was him. My group was constantly teasing me that I had indeed had a love story in the ship and I blushed real hard when they said that.

Finally I saw him. But this time, he just smiled and walked away. Didn't wait to talk to me, didn't wait to give me time to say anything. Just walked away with his folks. I was very disappointed but kept the smile on my face and waved him bye. I then got busy chatting with my group diverting my attention, trying hard not to think of him.

Suddenly I heard a pat on my back. I turned around to see it was HIM. I couldn't believe he had turned and come back to see me. And then it happened. He asked me to come closer to him. I did. And then, he gave me a peck on my cheek n said, "I'l miss you." He actually said that as a tear rolled from the corner of my eye. I told him I'l miss him too. And keeping that moment frozen in my memory, we walked ahead. In our own paths. I was so mesmerised in the moment that I forgot to ask him for his contact details.

I briefly saw him at the waiting area outside the ship again. And then I gathered courage to ask for his contact details. So I went up to him, greeted his parents n asked his dad for any contact that I could have of theirs so that I could send them Timmy's pictures. He did.

And since then, I briefly keep emailing them and speaking with Timmy's mother. And you know, my baby has matured from kindergarten to elementary school now. I just got his latest pictures in the mail today. And I'm soooooooooooooooooooo thrilled!!!

Two cities, One soul

I believe in dreams coming true. I believe that when you really wish for something real bad, wish for it with all your heart, it does come to you and sometimes in the most miraculous ways. One such wish/desire came true in 2009, for which it will remain one of the most memorable years of my life.

Like the profile of my blog says, I love to travel and the one place I've always wanted to visit has been Paris. Fondly called La Ville d'Amour (The City of Love), spending some time of my existence here has been a dream I've cherished since years altogether and have raved about it to every single soul I know including my senior colleagues at work. So when my senior colleague called me to inform that my birthday gift was underway and I get to travel to the city of cafés and couture in October 2009, it was hardly believable. But as I headed to my journey, a new revelation unfolded.

I wrote a lot during my brief stay in the city. As much as I saw the city, I craved for more. It was much like discovering the varied facets of your own soul. And realisation struck to me on why I love this city so much...
I found Paris to have a soul quite like my first favourite city in the world Bombay. I instantly found multiple reasons to prove this.

• There are tonnes of food places around. Several bistros, patisseries, restaurants alongside Chinese takeaways, Italian joints; offering a very global feel to the city.
• Parisians love being by themselves quite like any Bombayite.
• They are as protective about their language like a Mumbaikar, at the same time as global like any Mumbaiite.
• They are a complicated set of people, love their own space. Hence, they might come across as snobs. But they are very welcoming people.
  
• Paris like Mumbai has several narrow roads, with long cars screeching their way through them. Traffic is a problem there as well.
• There is some magic in the air. While you would see people standing on the bylanes, sipping coffee and watching the world go by, you sense the character of the city in itself, the soul of its surroundings. It just makes you feel alive.
• River Seine and the Arabian Sea keep the cities' soul stirring
• People living with hearts on their sleeves. Both the cities are the haven for lovers. While we find ours crowding up in Marine Drive or Bandstands, theirs stand in the middle of the road expressing their love as the voyeurs pass by. The musicians on the sidewalks, the smiling waiters, fill you with the sense of life that you might feel while taking a walk in Marine Drive.

• You can endlessly keep walking in the city and yet discover a new thing, a new aspect, an architectural wonder everytime.
• And like Bombay, Paris never sleeps.

I still reminisce the introspective moments spent in the city. Going to a quaint little store near my hotel to pick up some souvenirs for friends back home, having small talk with the shop owners nearby, passing through the cafés to smile to absolute strangers, the city told me to come back again, to discover some more, to fall in love with myself all over again.

This is to both Paris and Bombay, two cities with one soul. This is to that soul. Je t'aime.

Happy 2010

Its an utterly depressing state when you start deteriorating and more depressing it is when you let it happen. I've let it happen for sometime now but have had enough. Being a business journalist sure can have its cons. For one, you get so badly stuck with the jargon that everything seems to be a market, you analyse everybody's strategies, growth prospects, investments and expansion plans! I have been so stuck with this same thing that even after realising my passion for blogging needed fuel, it was let to exhaust in the back burner.
Hence, besides others, my 2010 resolution is to blog diligently. Write, create and rhyme once again and what best to start off with than to look back in the decade gone by.

It was a decade but today it seems like a lifetime in itself and what is life worth if nothing is learned from it?

I've learnt...

• grades aren't everything. But you still need them
• that repeating mistakes though best avoided, isn't always bad. They might give you a different experience everytime
• people don't change. They evolve... for better or worse
• sometimes your best friend is your worst enemy
• you must indulge in sinful desserts
  
• its great to be impulsive
• college is the best phase of your life
• it is important to bunk classes
• music is the best soul soother
• I'd love to travel to discover new people than new places
• first times have a charm that no other time would have
• getting your first salary is a moment of sheer pride
• happiness is spending your hard earned money on your parents and little sister and not saving them in a bank account
  
• it is a great thing to be confused
• to love and let go
• nothing and no one for which/who you would have to lie to your parents is ever worth the lie or to be a part of your life
• chirping birds, sunshine and rains could sometimes give you more happiness than anything
• good things always happen to bad people
• it is okay to start small in life. The scope of growth then, is much bigger
• one of my fondest memories of 'me-time' was to ride the bicycle early morning on my way to school
• you might have a million loved ones around you but you still live and die alone
• your gut instinct is the only thing that doesn't let you down
  
• not everyone you might meet through the virtual world is fake, but most are!
• its important to follow your passions. Its the best way to make yourself feel alive again

After all these, seems like it was quite an eventful decade. Phew!
The new decade will come with its bunch of surprises, learnings and excitement and after a crazy NYE with some of the most cherished people in my life, The Gibberians, I say... 2010? Bring it on!

Profiling

"So when will you write something on me," he asked me last night on the call that he had finally managed to make after months of silence. "Well, I don't profile people. That's not part of my job," I replied, quite curtly which I realised once I'd said. "I mean, I do not just profile any person unless he's part of the industry on which I report. The most you could be profiled is on my blog," I added swiftly.
He: Oh so you blog?
Me: Well used to do it religiously earlier, want to get back to it.

I wonder if a known devil is better than an unknown angel.

You meet people who take your breath away. Just a glimpse of a stranger who you'd meet passing by, makes you smile to yourself and then you go on, moving forward on your journey. This is not about them.

You also meet people when in the first glimpse your mind tells you, "This isn't where its going to end." And it doesn't. It just sparks off a series of small talk, initial discussions, meetings. And most often brief intervals of disappearing acts between the two. Someone told me once, "Its about playing calculated games. You need to play your cards smartly. I didn't call you 'coz I invested my time to meet you." Really???!!! Wow! The question remains what do the impulsive people, who do not know to play those mind games, go along with the stride do?

I wouldn't profile you Anon. However, you've been one of the most interesting people I've met. FYI for you: I hate people who do the 'Disappearing Act'. After all, he/she either is or isn't that into you!